I've tried to write blogs in the past, and I've had a hard time keeping up with them. I think the main reason is that I don't usually know what to say. I'm not a man of many words, so I tend to get my thoughts out in about a paragraph. It's never really impressive and after writing those aforementioned paragraphs, I tend to delete them, never post them.
While I'm not certain this will be any different, I want to start again. So here I am, starting yet another blog after several years off. The purpose of this blog, you ask? I'm not entirely certain. I don't rant much, I don't express my opinions often. I think, for the most part, I'll use this space as a place to update you fair readers on my artwork. If you've seen my Facebook page recently, you may have noticed a shift in the direction of my artwork. That same shift is prevalent on this website. I've started to paint. And I've started to paint a lot. Now, I'm not saying I've been going to the local art store and buy tubes of acrylic to splash all over some canvas. Nor am I wetting down thick paper with watercolors or gouache. No, I'm painting with pixels, and I couldn't be happier.
You see, over the past 5 or so years, I've been making comics. Albeit at a pace slower than a sloth climbs a branch. I, along with my friend and creative partner Andy Moore have worked on the series 'Flying Fortress' for the better part of those 5 years. In that time we managed to put out 7 issues with one more on the way. Those 8 books will end up telling a story that we cooked up before we even saw what the year 2010 was going to look like.
Fortunately, or unfortunately, I got burned out after finishing issue 7. Burned out to the point where I really wanted to hang up the pencils. I was tired of working on the book. And as I started to draw issue 8, nothing was working artistically. So after weeks of trying and failing, I finally decided to take a break. That break ended up being about 3 months long. In that time I reflected on why I was even drawing comics in the first place. and I realized that I didn't have any real answer. Let me explain. I came to the realization that I don't LOVE comics. I really don't. I enjoyed them when I was a kid (Coincidently the same age of life when I decided I wanted to draw comics) But I never really loved them. I barely bought them. And when I did, it was only to buy books based on who was drawing them at the time (I'm looking at you Jim Lee!) So that got me thinking. Why did I want to draw comics? It wasn't all that enjoyable. Getting a page done from start to finish was quite a struggle. More than it should have been, I though. I didn't have an answer.
So that's when I pondered what it is that I did love. The answer was easy. I love video games. I fucking LOVE them. My entire childhood was based around my Sega Genesis. Staying up late to play Mortal Kombat, trying to get all the Fatalities mastered. My friends and I would trade games back and forth, so we never really had to buy any. Any new games we got were usually on birthdays or Christmas. In my teen years, it only got more intense. I built my first computer so I could play Battlefield 2. I've been upgrading hardware ever since. But it wasn't just playing the games that got me, it was their whole experience. I would draw zombies because of resident evil. I made my own character books for Mortal Kombat. I'd draw each character, write a bio and put down their move lists so I always had it with me (and because in middle school I couldn't afford the strategy guide books). I did the same thing with World of Warcraft characters and crafting recipes. When I have a few extra bucks to spare I almost always spend it on a new game or a bundle of games from something like HumbleBundle.com I never spent them on comics. Heck I don't even buy stuff when I go to cons. Part of that is that I can't justify spending the money when I tend to make so little, but whatever.
So that's where I landed. I don't love comics and barely buy them. I do love games and buy and play them all the time. I also love to create. So why not create art for games? And that's where I'm at now. I'm 32 and I've found a new path to go down. A couple months ago I didn't know who to digitally paint, I still don't know how to paint traditionally, but that will come with time and practice. So, from now on, my artwork goals have changed. I'm not swearing off comics for good. I mean, I still have a cliffhanger I need to rectify and rectify it I will... someday. Yes, Flying Fortress has reached its penultimate issue and will come to and end in one more. However, I don't have a date for that. The book is written, I just need to draw it. In the meantime, I'm going to continue to learn to paint. I strive to get better and I long for the day when I'm hired by a company like Blizzard, Bethesda, Gearbox or a long list of other developers. Developers that made games that shaped who I am more than any comic ever did (except maybe the one I made).
Wow, look at that, I actually wrote a blog post that wasn't 4 sentences long. Is there a prize? Do I get candy? Somebody said there would be candy.